Meeting Jesus on the Water

So He said, "Some." And Peter had come down out of the boat, he walked on the water to go to Jesus. But when he saw that the wind was boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink he cried out, saying "Lord, save me!" And immediately Jesus stretched out His hand and caught him, and said to him, "O you of little faith, why did you doubt?"

Matt. 14:29-31

     It has been a long, rough week. I'd say Saturday through Wednesday morning where the hardest. They went by s...l...o...w...l...y! Now that New  Years is over with, Lord willing my husband can find a new job. I hadn't even remembered it was New Year's until everyone was texting us. 

     During this trialing time, I have to keep my eyes on Jesus! In church one men said he felt God leading him to read Matt. 14:29-31. And I thought that is how I feel. I'm trying to stay focused on God, but I struggle with fear. When that fear creeps in, more and more thoughts and fear creep in and I start to doubt and sink.

     I'm still struggling with disappointment and some anger. We are all boxed up and where looking for a HOUSE to rent up North. First off, I was excited to move up North (sad to leave our church though). It's close to ski mountains and they get more snow for the kids to play in. We would have had a house to ourselves to rent. Then we where planning on buying,. I was really looking forward to settling down and eventually buying a home. It's quite and out in the country that way. So even if we couldn't afford to own a lot of land, the kids would still have woods to run and play in. My hearts desire to own a home where we can all be under one roof. I can finally make a place cozy to live in and not have half our stuff in storage waiting. I would love to have chickens for fresh eggs and a very big garden. *smile* We where planning and dreaming and this time it looked like it was going to become a reality. But God has other plans. I am struggling with that. I have been reminded that God has something better planned, then that. Sometimes it feels hard to believe. BUT, I must keep my focus on HIM, not on what I feel or know. *smile*

     I am trying to stay focused on what I am thankful for. Here are a few:

1.      I am thankful for my church family. They have come along side of us to counsel, pray and encourage us. I have several other friends who's husbands are either out of work or have been in the same situation before. I am thankful for these other godly, older, sister's in-Christ to advice and encourage me. I am also thankful that my husband has godly men to encourage him.

2. I am thankful that Josiah (our son) still has medical insurance! He still needs quite a bit of medical care and get medical supplies delivered monthly. So I praise God for provided that for him.

3. We can continue going to our church.

4. We didn't get stuck in a yearly lease (way up North, far from friends and family), then find out a few days later that my husband didn't have a job!

5. That my husband is home to invest in his family. I truly believe that God used this job to bring my husband up here so we could all be together as a family. He did say he wanted a job that allowed him more time with his family! *chuckle* Now he has more time then he bargained for. All teasing aside, he can use this time to build our marriage, our children, our family, etc. Though I'd prefer my husband to not be out of a job, I am thankful that he is here! I have been joking that we have been married a month. Since we have never lived under one roof since, EVER. So it's been a challenge and more so now that we are all home together. But as "iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend." Prove 27:17

6. Though I don't like where we live, I am thankful we have a decent apartment to live in. I'm also thankful that I only have to share the washer and dryer with the family below us and that is it not coin operated (I had to remind my self of that detail). *smile*

Well, the list could go on for, "my brethren, count it all joy when you fall fall into various trials." James 1:2

Was there ever a time your or your husband was out of work? What did you do? I would love to hear from you!

For His glory,

No source of Income

Good Morning,


It has been a rough night. I didn't sleep much and am exhausted at this moment.

I have so much to share and have been so busy. There has been crazy up and downs to share with you. Moments of worry and moments of joy. Right now we are down. I am scared.

My husband came home early yesterday from his new job (yes, that right NEW job. I have so much to share) and well...informed me that he had been let go!!!

What?!? Say that again??! Yes, that's right we have $2,300 to our name, rent and a car payment that is due and no source of income.

Let me tell you, this is a scary place to be in!

I'll be very honest...I'm scared!! I'm struggling with trusting God. I feel ashamed for struggling with trusting Him. He has shown me over and over again, that he will provide! Why am I having such a hard time with it?

I like to plan and control things. I know that! :( But, God has continually ripped control over many if not all area's of my life. Was it wrong of me to get excited, that we are together as a family, that we where looking to rent a home, and talking of buying one in the near future? No! But I am struggling with not being able to plan our next move!! 

I question why right after Christmas that it happened? If it was before, we could have both tried to get part-time jobs during the Christmas season. We could have taken turns being home with the kids. But then again that is another area of taking matters into my own hands and not relying on God. Did He allow it to happen after Christmas, so that my husband and I will solely have to rely on Him?? 

I think if it didn't happen in the winter, I could see about growing a garden in someone's yard. I could harvest wild herbs for  my natural products on my etsy shop and for my family. Perhaps God has allowed it to happen during the winter, so that I can't and will have to learn to solely rely on Him.

I question, why I haven't sold anything in my shop. I can't expand and add new products if I don't sell any and bring money in! Has God not allowed me to sell anything, so that I will not have that "safety net"? But will solely rely on Him?

I know God is not cruel and would not make things more difficult on purpose  for no reason. So please don't think I am saying that. I just believe He allows things to happen or not happen to teach us to grow and to learn to rely solely on Him and not on ourselves.

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. Proverbs 3:5

It's unsettling not knowing what's going to happen and where our money is going to come from. But I KNOW it comes from God and He WILL provide for us!

For His glory,